Announcement [for 60 Sec Radio 2024]

We would like to remind you that feeding the mannequins in the abandoned clothing store is strictly prohibited. While we appreciate the sentiment, the mannequins have developed a taste for human flesh and are becoming increasingly difficult to satisfy with store-bought kibble.
Do not include poems containing existential themes when taking part in the Dog Park Poetry Slam as they tend to upset the pigeons. And in any case, judging will be based on tail wags and enthusiastic barking.
Stay tuned for traffic, which today consists entirely of unicycles ridden by invisible clowns.